Today I tried the “accepting Cal for who he is” thing.
It didn’t work so well.
I looked at Cal with his mushy chubby cheeks.
He’s not fat
but I got uncomfortable wishing his face were more tone.
It had nothing to do with him.
My mother-in-law had told my mom Cal is heavy.
So I winced inside when I looked at his slightly pudgy face today,
Worried other people won’t think I’m a good Mom,
Thinking if Cal looks different, people will think I’m doing a bad job.
– It’s about judging myself, not Cal.